a conversation

I hate you--
Words cold and bitter
Icicles on my lips
Breathed aloud
As if to convince
Myself of their sincerity

I want you--
My body moves
Suggestive, implicit
Deep longing and desire
Masked in calloused curiosity
Coated in defensive anger

Individual daggers--
We slay each other with our words
Twisting of the blades
Serpent tongues,
Belying true yearnings
Easier to maim than to trust

Paint and plaster—
Absorbing the impact
Merciless words reverberating
You lean closer
Still fighting myself
Still deceiving myself

Twisting blades--
Your words cut deeper
An ongoing battle
You lean closer
Alcohol on your breath
Gray smoke curls from your lips

Skittish eyes--
Darting around the room
Afraid to focus, connect
You lean closer
My hands fidgeting, grasping
You reach for them, for me

Deepening kiss—
Angry tensions hightening
Our mouths communicate volumes
No space between
Motives clear, intentions explicit
Finally, a conversation...
that I can understand